who was that kid you killed?

There was a Little girl i knew, she had a world of her own. Of course, there was this physical world around her where her mom, dad, siblings existed, where there were schools, and parks, friends, and pets to play around. but she had this world of her own in her mind where she lived. She had dreams which she knew for sure were going to come to life one day. This little girl would sit in her bedroom after she came home from school and take her sketchbooks, pencils, and paints and would colour her heart out. She would draw, birds, and animals, butterflies, and beautiful girls. People loved what she drew. For them, they were 2-dimensional colourful images on paper but in her mind, she could see her drawings in a very different way. it was almost like seeing a colourful hologram pierce out of a 2 Dimensional sheet of paper, where the paintings could speak and sing and dance and flutter. Her flat drawings, in her mind, would look like a Disney movie, where everything was beautiful and colourful and everything came to life.

One day after she came back from school, she sat down in front of a blank canvas and began to paint. she didn't think what she wanted to draw, she didn't think of a particular image but yet every stroke was more perfect than the next, slowly and gracefully converging to build a flawless masterpiece.  And when she eventually finished painting, she stared proudly at her work and smiled. The dark blue sky, with tones and shades of blue, and the stars twinkled in the painting she drew. It was very much obvious that she had a gift, she knew she was an artist. she could feel it in every inch of her soul. This painting she drew, she was very proud of it and she couldn't wait to show it to the world. For a little girl who lived in her little imaginary world, she had no idea that what she considered, her life, meant just a hobby for people around. She wasn't aware that being an artist is difficult in this world. but her passion for art was immense and she couldn't think of doing anything other than this.

Days went by, so did months and years. Time flew. Things changed, everything seemed new. School happened. Then college did, and she realized there was no Art in Art stream. For the world, art truly was a time-passing hobby. she grew to like other things. Her interest in other streams grew. Forgotten by now what she truly was, there were other things she tried to pursue. You know how we do things just because our friends are doing it? We all have been there, we all have done that. She was anxious now than ever before. Sinking under the burden of expectations the world around put on her. Her little imaginary world seemed lost too. Returning home one day, it was quite late, the streets were empty and dark. the only companion she had with her was the moon, which guided her home with its rays. it looked as though the stars were twinkling just for her. there was a cold breeze which tickled her cheeks. Her heart felt happy. She smiled as she reached home. She had this sudden urge to paint something even though it was almost the mid of the night, her urge wouldn't soothe. She sat down in front of a blank canvas and began to paint. She didn't think what she wanted to draw, She didn't think of a particular image but yet every stroke was more perfect than the next, slowly and gracefully converging to build a flawless masterpiece. When she eventually finished painting, she stared proudly at her work and smiled. All of a sudden, she started laughing and frantically started searching for something. Under her bed, in the corner, there was a box, all dusty and stained. She quickly opened the box and there, there was. 'The dark blue sky, with tones and shades of blue, and the stars twinkled in the painting she drew when she was 8 years old. Tears filled her eyes as she realized what she had been forgetting under the burden of the world around.

we try to fit in, we go after what may profit us more and the world around us, that we forget who we truly are and what our hearts truly desire. under the peer pressure of friends or say, family, we pursue things which we truly may not be happy doing. There is always a little girl/boy inside us who wanted to be, who wanted to do something other than what we are doing with our lives right now. the little boy, or a girl we killed unknowingly trying to be someone we are not. so today lets remember that little boy/ girl and do what he/she wanted to do.

This story is loosely based on me. I am Manisha. as my resume headline reads, "An Artist by soul and a ____________ by profession. (fill in the blank with whatever you do as a profession, whatever,... fill in the blank and comment down below) So you can see, who was that little kid you killed before you became who you are now?.